Lately, meditation has become a part of my daily routine.
Meditation in a stone shop, especially one surrounded by stones, provides a unique experience that you can't get at home. Strangely enough, when I meditate for 30 minutes in the shop, it feels like only about 10 minutes have passed, and my mind feels incredibly clear.
When I realized that this experience was what I often read about in books and on the internet as "clearing your mind," I was surprised and felt like I had opened a door to a new world.
However, I couldn't be sure if it was just a coincidence based on a single experience, so I tried meditating at home. But at home, I always end up focusing too much on "relaxing" and "clearing my head," which actually makes me tense up. In contrast, at the shop, I naturally lose track of time, and when I open my eyes, I feel refreshed.
I tried meditating at the shop for two weeks, and I noticed a clear change in myself.
It was the realization that, "Wait a minute, I'm not feeling irritated at all lately!"
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I vaguely expected that if I meditated, I would gain some kind of superpower or become a person overflowing with compassion.
As I continued, I realized that I was just "me," without superpowers or overflowing compassion, without expectations or disillusionment about myself.
These are the pleasures and discomforts I feel every day. For example, I have a sensitive stomach, so I can't actually eat a lot of meat; my eyes get tired if I don't dim the lights after 8 PM; and I can taste a little plastic in the paper bottle of the cafe latte from my favorite bakery... These are all small things, but by knowing them, I can easily avoid these little discomforts that are unique to me. And then, I'm just me, without the discomfort.
The feeling of "Nice to meet you, me" was very refreshing. The ordinary me, with its anxieties about "I want to be like this" and "I have to be like that," began to disappear. I could fully enjoy my favorite manga, and I started to feel the everyday "pleasures"—like how incredibly cute my dog is!—much more clearly than before.
Knowing me has made my everyday life a little softer and a little clearer.
If you feel generally down or sluggish every day, why not try meditation? I highly recommend it! You might find out the reason for your blah feelings. Even a short time can be the first step on a journey to know yourself. And may that journey be the catalyst for you to meet "Hello, I'm me."